I can share how I have been pressured to eat as directed for 'medical' reasons, and how having Intuitive Eating in my life has prevented the rebellion that does occur when food choices are NOT body directed. Certainly something life threatening as diabetes can be motivation to make changes. However changes that are not by desired choices (re)awaken a slumbering rebel that is within a person - to defend the same body that is being challenged .

Having stayed on my IE journey has shown to me that I CAN make body pleasing choices and that I am able to listen to the body I live in for feedback that best directs (what/when) is eaten. Change is usually difficult but the likes of diabetes can be doubly difficult since it turns out to be a huge switch from how one has eaten. The trick I have found is to s l o w l y find and add to (new) choices that appeal to taste and are available. As a person in a diabetes forum often reminds - Its a marathon, not a sprint. 

The end results is a happy & healthy body and spirit 🥰.  

Part of the program IS to do stuff that you "don't want to do," but I'm starting to wonder if the constant...going to bed excited to wake up and get an invigorating workout in and then actually waking up and wishing the world would just end...is not going to be sustainable.  Like...the very few days that I have done an early morning workout....the rest of the day has been GREAT.  But I don't have many of those days to shout for.  

Also, like...I like the feeling AFTER having worked out (or moved/exercised/etc).  Almost nothing else is motivating for me.  There's a body pump class every Wednesday at my gym at flipping 5:15 in the morning.  Yes, it's real hard getting up and going (and most of the time I miss it and go later in the day when I'd rather be making dinner or relaxing).  But I also feel like my muscles WANT it.  I do know there's benefit to other areas of my life when I've done a little strength training and other exercise.  

Just don't know if I'm trying to overdue it or if I need to let go completely and not "plan" anything and just exercise when mind and body really want it.  I don't know.  I'm thankful for the progress I've been making with the eating side of IE.  Just a little discouraged about the movement part.

Regardless of which version of the IE book you have, look at the Index in the front for the chapter on Stages. Most of us (myself included!) read the entire IE book, but somehow this chapter eludes us. My thoughts are that Diet Culture has us so captured that we automatically seek out the 'To Do' without looking enough at the foundational reasoning upon which this (IE) process builds. 

Stage One: Readiness - Hitting Diet Bottom can and usually is (thought to be) as simple as saying to one's self "I will NEVER diet again." While that is very heartfelt and needs to be affirmed to/by one's self, unless a good and strong evaluation of the role dieting has played in your life, it near impossible to 'know your enemy', thus preparing & being able to overcome it (Diet Culture). This Stage need not take long - a few days or week's worth of time - but it is a very valuable understanding of what it IS that you are up against. Examining and pondering IE Principle 1 - Reject the Diet Mentality is all that needs to be undertaken at this Stage. Further, Rejecting Diet Mentality is an ongoing effort as well as is a part of ALL 10 IE Principles. As a person is able to embrace this Stage, the better s/he will be able to utilize rejecting Diet (& Culture!) Mentality in all the other IE Principles.

A Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins With a Single Footstep. - Chinese Proverb

Last night, I became hungry, as I usually do after a choir rehearsal, and I realized I wanted popcorn! (I hardly ever want popcorn).  Then it clued me in to how IE ideally IS about our biological hunger and fullness cues.  Yes....people have warned against the "hunger/fullness diets."  So then that puts me back into eating whenever and whatever.  

But for me that's not progress.  In order to change habits so that I can yes, feel better in my body and move throughout life (I want to run again, but I'm not doing it at the expense of my knees at my current weight), I DO need to change.  And, in a way, adhering primarily to my hunger/fullness cues...in a way....DOES feel like a diet...only because it's a CHANGE.  I know I can eat what I want...and when my BODY/MIND wants it.  If I went with what just my mind wants all the time, I'd be feeling uncomfortable.  So yeah...sometimes I feel like I need permission from others to EAT or to NOT EAT.  So now, I need permission to NOT EAT if I'm not truly hungry (I'm allowing myself more freedom with the occasional snack that gets offered too).

Anyway, I come from the idea that IE was always about "giving yourself permission to eat" and just eating whenever whatever no matter what.  I thought it was "diet mentality" to limit anything or to stop eating or not eat for any reason.  If I want chocolate when I'm not hungry or when I know it will make me feel not so great....not only can I still have it...I HAVE to have it!

Or so I thought....I'm realizing that perhaps some of my OCD or religious scrupulosity might have an affect on my eating.  It's obviously a nightmare when it comes to diet culture.  But I've also approached IE with OCD tendencies as well.  "Still want to lose weight?  That's diet mentality!  Want to adhere mostly to your hunger and fullness cues?  That's diet mentality! Want to take it easier with sugar to see if that helps me feel better and more energized? That's diet mentality!"

But no.  I'm rereading the book and it sounds like I've been interpreting ANYTHING outside of a free-for-all as "diet mentality."  Whereas it does appear to be more about biological hunger, fullness and satisfaction.  Sometimes saying "no" to something yes, IS honoring my body.  Just not from an external source.  

I know I have permission.  I have several previously forbidden foods in my house.  And it's ironic.  I don't want it as much anymore (then the OCD voice says, "but IE says you have to have it if you think about it!").  I'm finding that it's a let down now because part of the appeal before was the "forbidden" nature of it.  Now I feel more in tune with how things FEEL with my body.  This DOES involve a change in habit, and therefore it feels like a "diet."  But in order to feel my best, perhaps it does need to feel that way for a while (and yes, I have some postural issues that necessitate needing to lose some weight...and I'd like to run again....but not through diet mentality, but through adhering to my body's signals).

Anyway, just thought I'd say "hi" and share part of where I am.

I read a book titled Blood Sugar 101 by Jenny Ruhl which informed me about the disease, the medicines used and what eating choices were recommended. Happily I had been practicing IE long enough to not read these suggestions as RULES. I was able to begin eating LESS carb dense foods as I was able to replace the high carb foods I enjoyed with less carb dense choices. Overall this worked well. My A1c dropped into the upper 5's and I actually lost belly reserves (aka fat) even needing to buy new (smaller!) pants.

What additionally assisted me was wearing a CGM (Continuous Glucose Monitor) which helped me to know which foods my body reacted badly to insulin wise. Again, being able to replace OR eat very occasionally, the foods that my body managed with difficulty, has kept my blood sugar in the lower ranges of potential concern.

IE is a 'life time' effort which may seem like an onerous challenge at first, but those who take a longer (life time) view of this process find it works for you. The hardest part of IE - especially initially - is backing off the diet mentality (aka I must do .../this way is right ) diet mentality that seems to rule our human daily world. Honoring one's SELF ought not to be hard work, but it is worth it! After all its YOUR life 🥰

Why can’t I do this? It seems so simple and yet I’ve been struggling with it for quite some time. Is it my body dysmorphia? Does everyone with disordered eating have BDD? I don’t treat myself with respect and dignity, though, so maybe this is an underlying issue that has more to do with the childhood abuse I experienced.

Instead Intuitive Eating suggests (IE = no rules!) that each person begin an exploration of one's eating choices and habits. That effort is only a search for information, its not a succeed/fail undertaking. Doing that begins the process of reconnecting with one's body which results in choosing to honor that same body as it has always required.

Difficult as it can be - examining what one finds to be Diet Culture in your life - is a necessary and excellent basis for turning away from Diet Culture, then progressing towards reclaiming how one's body has  always wanted to be fed as well as is its eating birth right.

I had some time ago bought a blood glucose meter and used it to find that my blood glucose was within 'normal' ranges. I knew about a highly recommended book - Blood Sugar 101 - so bought and read that. It turned out that the #s determining 'normal' were not what was best for a healthy body! In fact the #s were only for the level at which one would be officially diagnosed 'diabetic' with organ damage already underway.

Because I as in the 'pre' stage of this disease, I decided to find out what I could do to prevent or at least put off and manage what could be required of me to do for dealing with such a condition. The Blood Sugar 101 book indicated that significantly decreasing carbohydrate intake could decrease insulin resistance (aka type 2 diabetes). I found and joined an online forum that discussed living with diabetes. There I found alternatives that I could choose from and in fact enjoy!

One by one I found, and have replaced high carbohydrate food choices with lower carb level foods. This has not only assisted lowering of blood glucose levels, but also helped my body to release excess 'reserves' (aka fat)! AND keep diabetes out of my life.

I had years back half joked that I wouldn't weigh myself until my pants fell off (lol). That has practically happened now. but my desire to know or honor such numbers has gone away. Instead I am happy to know that slowly I have chosen new (to me) foods that not only continue to satisfy me, but also assist my body in its health.

Wishing everyone the joys of Intuitive Eating.

Intuitive Eating has taken a bit to shift my brain but I can see it taking hold. 

Im surprised about how relieved I feel. I don’t feel superficial excitement but I also don’t feel overwhelming stress. I just feel at peace. 

Not sure if anyone else gets what I am saying but I am confident in my journey to being healthier and happier (at whatever weight I may be or end up at).  Focus is on energy and feeling better!